nurture your marriage/regaining intimacy
As a Certified Pastoral Counselor and a Qualified Mental Health Professional, one of my focuses and purpose is helping couples in their purpose to restore their relationship through increasing cohesion, improving communication, promoting forgivenness and hope, and restoring or increasing their level of intimacy...
Something I wrote (while on my pastoral ministerial soap box) on marital intimacy after reading and gleaning from " Strengthening marital intimacy" by Ronald E. Hawkins
Marriage today
is in trouble and the divorce rate is high even within the church. Because of
this fact, there have arrived many marriage and family programs, marital help
books, seminars and marriage enrichment ministries that are designed to help nurture and strengthen marriages, and equip premarital couples. There are various societal
and internal influences that affect couples and these influences are broadening
such as negative poor examples of families on television shows, the lack of
understanding of what God’s intent and purpose in marriage, depletion and lack
of intimacy and commitment, emotional, spiritual and psychological issues that
each partner in a marriage carries.
These factors
cause wear and tear on the amount of intimacy, nurturance (providing emotional and physical support & care), and EFFECTIVE/POSITIVE communication in marriage.
The truth is that God is no longer the third strand in many marital relationships, and society along with its people have deterred from God and His plan and values on marriage, found in the book of Ephesians 5:22. The author Ronald E. Hawkins wrote a book
titled Strengthening Marital Intimacy. His book addresses
God’s design, marriage goals, commitment, sexuality, the foundation of
marriage, communication and more. Studies have shown that strong marriage are
beneficial to society because they add stability and a sense of community, and
this ‘sacred’ institute creates financial stability as well because two people
coming together create less of a financial strain within a household and can
also provide financial support for both individuals in a marriage.
In regards to
maintaining marital intimacy, without welcoming spiritual and wisdom
directions, and influence from God, intimacy is often lost in a marriage and if
any, marriage goals dissolve. It takes much prayer and effort to both build and
maintain a strong marriage. Hawkins note, “God-honoring marriages do not just
happen. They are the result of diligent prayer and hard work on the part of
both husband and wife.”[1]Wisdom
is revealed by God to help marriages. Marriage is no longer viewed and valued
as a sacred and godly ordained institution. It is now treated as a daunting
unbiblical relationship without the spiritual disciplines of prayer, and
consulting the Bible for direction and governing.
Reference:
[1]Ronald
E. Hawkins, Strengthening marital intimacy, (Grand Rapids, MI:
Baker Book House, 1991): 10.
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