One of
the many ways to encourage premarital couples to identify positives attributes
in each other and also respond positively with optimism would be first to
demonstrate to them how they could develop positive affirmations that would
combat their own internal personal negative irrational thoughts and
perceptions. When one learns to change the way he or she thinks and feel about
his or herself in a positive outlook they can begin to build up/affirm their
loved one’s esteem and identify their positive attributes. I would admonish
premarital couples to understand that each is a child of God in order to
maintain some level of godly respect for each other. When you are and confident
you are able to esteem your partner. What I sometimes encounter during a counseling
session is interacting with a client who can easily encourage and maintain
optimism towards his/hers loved one but have difficulty doing the same for
him/herself.
This
behavior can cancel out any positive affirmations or optimistic attitude and
behavior from the other person because a positive + negative = negative. A
couple can practice new behavior especially for those individuals who tend to
be pessimistic or always see the glass half empty. In addition, Drs. Les &
Leslie Parrott, #1 New York Times Bestselling Authors of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts notes,
“Learning to choose your attitude is not easy, but once measured, a positive
attitude paves the way for a fulfilling marriage.”[1] Consequently, when one
partner in a relationship... See entire article, "Attitude of Optimism in Couple" and featured video by Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott.
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